In an early morning, I just want to cry. Hurts from my chest, my stomach, my legs, my arms, makes me deft and paralyzed several times. Burst from last night, yesterday, and the other night seems stay longer that it usually did. I try to scream again and again, but I am just only hear a whisper. I don’t know it is because of my voice too weak or my ears slowly turns deft. I woke up in a place that I can’t see it clearly, I can smell something rotten in the corner, I think it is a rotten flesh. I hear sound from one corner, I think that is mouse cry for a food. And I have smell blood everywhere too. I try to hold my feeling not to surrender from this, but this constant situation makes me loss my hopes to feel a fresh air. I never think that the fresh air will be so luxurious for me. Or I never taste is before.
I don’t remember why I am here. What is the reason of me being in this place. I just woke up in a place with a lot of women in a place at the first time I had remember. I was wake up in a bed, 2 story bed. I am in the first level, I saw a woman above my bed. Soon I knew here, her name is Lisa. She don’t know why her name is Lisa. She told me that the nanny called her Lisa. It is strange, because I don’t know my name either. I became curious and asked for other girls name. And they said same thing. They don’t know their names. I hold on my self not to cry and frustrated. I think I could became crazy at that time but I keep on my bull heart, I will find out why ,how and who.
Suddenly a nanny came from the door of my room, she said, “ Hey, Lira ! You awake ? Get yourself ready for a meal ! wake up your body from the floor ! oh you are a mess ! “. I hate her. Beside she is so mean, she stinks. I hate the fact that she bring me a meal with that metal plate. I slowly move my body toward the plate. When she see me like that, I heard she giggles. I just take the plate fast and after that she is gone. I look into the cold metal plate. There is no happy ‘things’on the plate, just a grumble soup with plain taste.
The Look :